Bah, it's what you make of it.
Purely and entirely.
Crushes are a pleasant thing altogether but I'm a pretty big romantic so even the more unpleasant parts are like a beautiful miracle to me. Nothing beats that feeling when your heart flutters and you forget what you were just thinking ♥

fr0z3n_4ng3i

I just wrote a long and emo entry about how sick I am of crushing on people, but you know what? Fuck it. Emcy's right. I am only to blame if this goes badly. Well, okay, 50% to blame, but I have a responsibility here. I have to stop being stuck in the silly pattern I always return to when I crush on someone. Like, now. I have to stop obsessing and craving attention and just chill out a bit. I've drawn a salomon on my hand to remind myself that I need to relax (if you don't speak Norwegian, don't expect to get this). I have to get to terms with me feeling like this being inevitable, and just let myself go with the flow for once. I have to get my head out of my butt, as it were. It's not like those bad feelings go away, but I can try and make something positive out of them and learn something new about myself. I am sick of being my pessimistic, self-loathing self, and I am going to try to do something about it. Starting today.

I've been roaming around
Always looking down at all I see
Painted faces, fill the places I can't reach

You know that I could use somebody
You know that I could use somebody
Someone like you

And all you know, And how you speak
Countless lovers under cover of the street

You know that I could use somebody
You know that I could use somebody
Someone like you

Off in the night, while you live it up, I'm off to sleep
Waging wars to shape the poet and the beat
I hope it's gonna make you notice
I hope it's gonna make you notice

Someone like me
Someone like me
Someone like me, somebody

Someone like you, somebody
Someone like you, somebody
Someone like you, somebody

I've been roaming around,
Always looking down at all I see

- Use Somebody; Kings of Leon

Damned great song, fits me right now. I like how it's negative and positive at the same time. Funny thing about me & music is that lately I've been really really picky about what I listen to, but if I find a song that I like I will play it over and over and over again. Circus by Britney Spears, We Walk by The Ting Tings and Desolation Row by My Chemical Romance (WHICH BY THE WAY IS SO FUCKING AWESOME I COULDN'T BREATHE WHEN I HEARD IT FIRST. I miss that band) have been thoroughly played through.

And then there's Oasis in a couple of hours. It will be smashing, I'm certain.

[edit] Thank you to you who bear this, and especially those of you who have to live through me talking until I am sure you want to gauge your ears out with a spoon in Real Life. I am so grateful for having someone to rant/talk/flail to. Really ♥

Happy birthday insane_sarah!

I hope you had a nice day, and got all the things you wanted :]]

On a side note; I have bangs! For the first time since 4th grade or something. I've been seriously thinking about it for quite a while, and when I walked the last little stretch home from the metro (less than a 100 meters) I went "Ah screw it". So I got the scissors and went to the bathroom and got me some nice bang bang you're dead. I am seriously dying to have a camera, mrf.

DEAD IS THE NEW ALIVE!1!@!

But seriously; Emilie Autumn last night was am-az-ing. It was the most show-oriented concert I've ever been to, and it was really very cool. Just.. the set-list was great, they played all the songs I really like, and they were so nice at the signing when I talked to them. They seemed genuinely happy that I told them that I was impressed, and one of them signed the CD I brought with "Follow your dreams!" and another called me gorgeous, which was nice but not really something I took seriously seeing as she went around kissing about any girl who was up for it, haha. And I went all by myself! First concert I've gone to alone ever. I was surprised it could be that great still.

As a consequence, I've been dressed up sort of cabaret-ish today.

( Here's the attire and the new hair )

OMG EDDIE IZZARD ON TV *runs* and Harry Shearer, on The Graham Norton Show! But my dad is being stupid and says he was watching a movie (THAT YOU CAN RENT), so he just swapped channels. I gotta pester him to see the damned thing. I hate when dad doesn't understand what is important to me. Like back in 2007, when My Chemical Romance came to Norway, I ran around crying in the apartment and asked if I could go, and he just went: "No". Without even hearing me out! He's so unwilling to communicate sometimes.

Comments on the show: Harry Shearer is the nicest man ever. He just agreed to call a fan who made a lego-Simpsons intro. In a Mr. Burns voice. But honestly, that guy sucked at English. Mr. Izzard doesn't seem to agree with me. And they're showing The Death Star Canteen :D Ahh, the small pleasures of being a geek. And Harry Shearer's released a CD with satirical songs that I want. It's called Tales of the Busmen, and features pres. Bush with a bone through his nose on the cover.

And and I was at this concert that I forgot to mention a week ago or something, with Kaizers Orchestra. That was cool, but the least interesting show I've been to because we had to be in the "Under 18" area. 's cool that they're Norwegian, though. It makes the fact that their music is good so much more interesting.
And on Norwegian music, check out this song. It is awesome. I heard it last night, and it's all I've been listening to today.

/end ranty blog-post.

Happy birthday augustfalcon & my dad!

Hope you had a smash-dashing day with loads of nice presents and people :D


PS: I'm dying my hair pink in 20 minutes approx. I am so excited! Haven't told anyone but bokhylle (nevermore_1106, sorry to spoil the surprise) and I can't wait until people see it tomorrow. Hee hee, it feels good and cunning. They all think I was going to do it next week. And I didn't flunk my Maths test, and I'm so relieved you wouldn't believe it. And I got a decent grade on my Russian test. Honestly, everything just feels okay right now.

Right now I'm having a major headache. Probably due to a long school day complete with a geography test, and maximum 4 hours of sleep. Durrrr, not a good idea.
Felt like the test went well, but it never ends up the way you think it will.

Hm. Interesting things that has happened:

- I went to this intimate, 150 people concert with DumDum Boys, one of the most famous Norwegian rock bands. I wasn't really planning on going, but man am I glad I went. It was amazing, I stood all the way up front, the music was a lot cooler than I thought before, I got a pick, I met a lot of people I know (probably 15% - 20%) and it was generally an awesome experience. As said, so glad I went.

- Had this girly girl night for my friends from elementary/junior high/whatever is correct in terms of translating the Norwegian school system to the English/American one. We split up in separated cliques, as usual, and that both made me and makes me really sad to think about. I wish people would just grow the fuck up sometimes. Alright, some of my friends don't get along that well, but I wish they'd think about something bigger than themselves for once (like the fact that I spend 400 kr of my own money and go out of the way to make taco, just because they wanted it).

- The American dude I mentioned in this post is most likely going to stay at my place a couple of weeks. The bureau he's with, AFS, is sort of in a crisis, and they're unable to find a family to replace the current welcome family. I'm more than happy to lend out my place, and mom's more or less said yes. Good for her English, good for my English and good for his Norwegian. And anyway, he's a friend now. I'm more than happy to help him out :)

- We've got a stationary bike in our basement. Helloooo, exercise.

- Cabin trip with my class from Friday to Saturday asskjglfaklgjafgsn ♥

Um. Yeah. I'm terribly full right now. Ate too much <_< Bad habit, that. I keep losing and then gaining weight because of it. Anyway, ought to do my Russian homework. Will do it. Soon. Very soon. I promise.

I'm excited for school tomorrow cause feeling dumb has passed, I made out with a total stranger yesterday who was very hot at my friends very fun birthday and we have a beautiful grand piano that makes me want to practice my piano lessons a lot more than I have done before because I want to be good at playing, just like Amanda Palmer in my icon.

Sometimes being a teenager is really cool (although I wish I wasn't sick).

I'm leaving for Iceland today, coming back the 7th. Drat everything in this world for me losing my camera. I might steal some space from my sister, though, so I can post some pictures. Dammit, I haven't done ANY of the concert posts either. It's not like a whole lot of people care, but I like having it written down so I can go back and read things over.

Anyway. I haven't been doing much lately besides lurking around with my friends, both old and new. And I think I'm finally over that damned crush on Adrian, yay! This is something that is defintitely worth celebrating. I still love him, but in a completely different way. It's so relieving :D
Also, there's this guy who's expressing interest in me, but I'm not sure if I'm really that into him. I mean, he's a nice guy, funny and sweet (he's even in a band) but I just don't have those feelings for him. I love the feeling of being validated but I want to keep my options open too, in case there are any nice guys at my new school.

About that: I was accepted to the school I wanted! YAY! It's called Oslo katedralskole, and is widely known as the best school in Oslo. Henrik Wergeland, Edvard Munch, Jostein Gaarder and our Prime Minister, amongst others, have attended this school. I have one of my definitely better friends there (namely nokomedandrea. Babe, expect a snuggleglomp first day of school), and bokhylle is most likely going to go there with me too. :D I'm so excited, I've met two or three others who go to this school already this summer, and they are literally fabulous. I can't wait for the 18th.

And, in case you didn't notice, I've changed my icons. I have yet to do some minor adjustments, but I'm much more happy with how everything is now.

Right now, life is good.

This is (l to r) Tiril and me, btw.

We haven't gotten our internet yet, and the connection to the ones I'm leeching off is bad. Interneting will be resumed on the 23rd, hopefully. That's when we're supposed to get it, anyway.

I'm working on giving my icon batch a total makeover. I have a ton of icons I want and only room for 15 D: LJ should expand it to 20. If having unlimited space for icons is one of the pros of having a paid account, 5 icons won't matter much in the grand scheme of things.

Aaaaaannnd my picture with the Dolls cuz I can't contain my excitement about it. When I stood there I was so OMG WHAT TO DO WHEN ARE YOU TAKING THE PICTURE HOW DOES MY FACE LOOK? and I've been walking around thinking that my smile looked totally fake. Turns out it didn't. I dunno what the hell John is on, but I love his expression xD ♥ I've edited it, but only the red in our eyes. My eyes didn't have an iris or anything, they were just all over red. It was slightly scary, to be honest. I look totally ridiculous, try to ignore that, eh? And as you probably can see, my hair has faded quite a bit.



Gah, the picture's grainy. I resized it in rich mode, not photoshop. Well, lesson learned. Right now I was just anxious to get the entry done before the 'net decides to die on me. Fixed :D

I'm leaving for England on Tuesday :D Landing in Nottighamshire, taking train or similar to Liverpool, trudge around there for two days and then; meet the friggin Goo Goo Dolls. IIIIIIH! I'm so excited, the reality of it has finally hit me. Or, at least it feels more real than what it did a week ago. I started counting down when there was 88 days left. Now it's 7 days to go. I've got butterflies in my stomach. *faliling around*

I need to get hold of If by Mindless Self Indulgence, No, Virginia.. by the Dresden Dolls, ***** by Fall Out Boy, maybe the Alien Ant Farm albums and other misc. music-things. Oh, and and the Host by Stephenie Meyer. Mustn't forget the books.

The internet is as unstable as it has been the few days I've lived here. It's a source of great nuisance. It doesn't help my insomania either, I sit up late at night trying to get online. I slept a total of 30 minutes this night until I decided to get up around 8. It's really exhausting, and I believe I've caught a cold because I haven't really slept normally since before Hove. I did sleep a bit around 2 P.M. but I tried to keep it to a minimum, so I'm really tired tonight and will fall asleep right away. At least, that's the plan.
Ugh. I just do not want to be sick when I'm in England. That would be a bummer.

Happy Independence Day to my Americun fwiends! And a happy Goo Goo Dolls day in Buffalo, New York..

I'm looking for new icons. Again. I fell head over heels in love with the Joker when I watched Batman earlier today, I need an icon of him. Comics = ♥

I got home from the Hove festival the day before yesterday. And boy was that fun! But more of that in another post.

The reason I'm updating right now is because I had the possibly worst night ever in my life when I came home.

( 'It's not a problem, mom!' Wrong. )

I guess the moral in this story is that my sister is not anywhere near being as mature as me. Now, that might sound really arrogant, but she's just .. such a teenager. And I'm only two years older than her. I have really bad sleeping problems now, even worse than before. I'm terrified of anything happening to her, and it's completely irrational, but it's so deeply wedged into me. *sigh* Last night I fell asleep at around 4 AM (also because I sat up watching and converting youtube-videos of Eddie Izzard).

In completely unrelated terms;

Happy belated birthday iwouldstay! I hope you had a good day, though from what I've read it's was merely okay. Please correct me if I'm wrong. Izzard sends his love.